Yesterday, January 23rd, 2010, was exactly two years since my younger brother almost lost his life. It is an eerie feeling to remember that day, that moment. However, each year I go back to that day. I want to celebrate my miracle brother. This entry is a tribute to his strength, his courage, his spirit, and his life.
I was getting ready for work and I noticed I had a voicemail. I cried, I shook, I shattered. I am a teacher, so I called the school and told them I couldn't work that day. I set up a quick lesson plan and began to drive to UCI Medical Center. I was not certain that he was even alive. Our lives passed through my mind. His sweet innocence of a precious child. I remember thinking that if he was to die, I would never be the same. Our childhood days are gone, but the unspoken connection is something I keep close to my heart. It was cold that day. I finally got to see him. It is a horrible thing to see someone whom you care about so deeply in such a miserable condition. I will never forget the first time I saw him. His eyes were swollen shut: black. He had a tube in his head. The worst part was that no one could tell us he would live. It was too soon and it would be a long road. There are endless details to life in the weeks following that day which I will never let go of. That first night I went home to Cory's house. He held me as I cried and shook for what seemed like hours. Some of my favorite memories with Timothy in his recovery days are: watching him sleep, helping him clean up his room, watching him learn to walk again, watching him interact with Isis, walking into his room and seeing him smile, being with him when he was able to leave the hospital walls and lift his eyes up to the sunshine, taking him to get snacks in the cafeteria, listening to him tell me about Bob Dylan, spending the night on Valentine's day, and watching him tell all of his doctors and nurses that he had to get out of the hospital so that he could walk me down the aisle at my wedding! He amazed me everyday. His small victories were impressive. His kind soul was magnified.
My brother Timothy Patrick Flanagan is a true miracle in this world. It has been two years since his life changing accident. I am continually proud of him. I cannot say that I understand his journey. I feel as though the sanctity of the state of his life and mind belongs to him and the Lord. I have complete faith that he wants to be a good man: he is an amazing man. I see him getting stronger each day. I long to see my brother happy. I long to stand beside him and feel confident that he knows he is loved, valued and cherished. Our family is not complete without him. Tim's accident two years ago changed his life and mine. The Lord does all things well, and I am blessed to have him as my brother.
Stay strong Timothy. I love you. I am thankful for the miracle of your life every single day.
