The Root of It All.

The Root of It All
Sarah Clarke
4 February 2009


At the beginning of it all, the desired end is young people who know how to act right. I wake up, I teach English, but what I want them to learn has very little to do with English. I coach basketball, but what I hope they gain has little to do with winning games. I have come to realize that I find myself in many different leadership positions. I teach. I coach. Daily, the results within my view are meager. The results, they are hungry. They are unseen. I do not always see, and I am discovering that perhaps the design has nothing to do with what is visible to me.

I am an instrument. I can choose to be used, or I can choose to waste these blessed places upon which I stand. Alone. The life I have been given is a lonely one at times. I did not choose loneliness as a child: I choose it now. This loneliness of which I speak, it is not sad. The loneliness does bring tears. The loneliness does bring doubt. Above all, the loneliness is my passion. I do not speak of being surrounded by none. I encounter innumerable young faces each moment of my week. Mrs. Clarke, Mrs. Clarke, Mrs. Clarke. Flan, Flan, Coach Clarke. What makes it lonely?

I suppose that this is one of my latest epiphanies. I have a vision. By grace, I have learned excruciating lessons. Should I keep these lessons to myself? I am passionate. I feel. I connect and relate everything, and I mean everything, to what it takes to be a person of desire, character, and love. I have chosen to share. I take my roles seriously. I cannot settle for mediocre when teaching life. I do not want to let young people go through my life without learning something about the world.

If you cannot remember to bring your books and supplies to class, how are you going to remember to pay the rent on time? If you cannot remember to show up to your job on time, you will no longer have that job. If you cannot turn in your assignments, how are you going to prove that you are the best candidate for a job? If you cannot be respectful in class, how are you going to have respectful relationships? If you cannot speak without profanity, how is anyone going to take your seriously? If you cannot stay awake in class, how are you going to stay awake during business meetings? If you cannot communicate with patience, understanding, and perspective, how are you going to keep friends? If you cannot strive, how are you going to follow dreams? If you cannot conquer simple tasks, how are you going to face enormous, and possibly life changing, challenges? If you cannot listen, how are you going to find someone to listen to your heart? If you cannot smile, where will you find happiness? If you do not speak, will anyone know you are here? If you cannot question, how will you discover what you believe? If you cannot get beneath the surface of what is seen, how will you know depth?

If you cannot show commitment, how will you learn what it means to be a part of something that is bigger than yourself? If you cannot show up to practice on time, how will you remember to pay the bills? If you cannot fundraise and work hard for the basketball gear that you are provided with, how will you learn responsibility and accountability? If you cannot take care of your uniforms, how will you take care of the belongings you pay for? If you cannot work hard, how will you ever accomplish anything on your own? If you cannot play defense, or try at least, how will you know the importance of teamwork. If you cannot take a charge, how will know the true significance of self-sacrifice? If you cannot talk on defense, how will you communicate to your loved ones in a time of emergency when your role in their lives is vital? If you cannot get better at decision making, shooting, passing, ball handling, and essential basics, how will you respond when self improvement becomes necessary? If you cannot rebound, how will you know what it feels like to want something more than everyone else does? If you cannot dive on the floor for loose balls, how will you value the most important things in your life? If you cannot encourage, how will you make yourself the type of person that others cannot live without? If you cannot find your attitude and edginess, how will you deal with watching others take what you desire? If you cannot honor this game, how will you honor your life? If you cannot heed constructive criticism, how will you know how to make yourself better? If you cannot respect your teammates and their individual personalities, how will you survive in the sea of unique faces: the world? If you cannot be wrong, how will know what right is? If you cannot be silent, how will you cherish the value of words designed for a unique purpose? If you cannot push yourself beyond what is comfortable, how will know what you are capable of? If you cannot be fearless for moments, how will you handle perpetually living in fear? If you cannot be competitive, how will you find a place for yourself to stand? If you cannot lead at times, how will you live with always being someone whose thoughts are unspoken? If you cannot trust the ones who have come before you, how will you be prepared to impart wisdom to the blessed children who will someday follow you? If you cannot be a good example to those who look up to you, how will they know what living rightly actually means? If you cannot remember the lessons you have learned, how will they help you? If cannot take your role in this world seriously, how will you deal with being treated as if you are a joke. If you cannot communicate your hurts and frustrations respectfully to those in authority, how will you be heard: understood? If you cannot trust with your whole heart that some leaders know what you need, how will you open up your stubborn mind and let wisdom fester?

I speak to this to my students. I speak this to my team. These are the thoughts that run through my mind. I want you to understand grammar rules and offenses, but what I am most passionate about is you. Your heart, your decisions, your actions, and your ability to move on to whatever your future may hold. My job is lonely. You do not understand why I say and do the things that I do. I accept that. I am aware that my presence in your life is not about me. You may not understand now, but when you get to your tomorrow, hopefully you’ll use some of the tools I have relayed to you. You are worth the days when I feel like no one else in the world understands. If I wanted everyone to love me, I would not be teaching and coaching. “I have looked at clouds from both sides now.” I have seen the world through your eyes, and I have ventured on to see the world’s mountain tops and valleys. I followed leaders who taught me how to act rightly. I was stubborn. I was angry. I was misunderstood. I was taught, and now I am blessed to guide you in ways that are promising. I have seen unsuccessful, and I have turned my back on it. Success is not measured by what you do; it is measured by the strength of your character. Who are you when no one else is looking?

I have not arrived. I learn from you as I lead. Let us all give in to pursuing our utmost in a world of mediocrity. Perspective…